The first step is admitting it....right? When I started having kids at the age of 16 it never occurred to me, that #1 I would have lived this long, and #2 how much fun it would be! Being so young, I have kind of grown up with my kids. I had my first four by the time I was 23 and then waited a while and had another four in my 30's. There is such a difference between how I raised my older four, compared to my young four. The older four had strict rules, there was never a gray area, it was only black and white, right or wrong! They were so well behaved, took care of their toys and had clean rooms (well.....most of them). The younger four have been more of a democracy. We work together to set the rules, they have their input on ideas as pertaining to our home. There is so many gray areas because I am more relaxed and have learned to pick and choose my battles. I ask myself, will this matter next week? If not, I usually them hash it. Could it be due to the fact that I am older, more tired? I say yes! I went through nursing school and worked full time with my older four but always the energy. Now, I finished college last year, while working full time, and raising these kids (with tons of help from my mom and older kids) but I am more tired now than when I went to school. Now I only work!!!! Anyway, I am moving away from my point.
The point I want to make is even with both sets of kids (older and younger).....I TOTALLY LOVE BEING WITH MY KIDS! I miss them terribly when I am at work and look forward to the end of the day. Even if we are just hanging out at home (which we have done a lot lately because it has been -0 degrees). I LOVE MY KIDS! They make me laugh, they make me cry and I am totally addicted to them. Is that so bad? Out of all the addictions to have, this one is the safest for sure. People say I will lose friends, well then, so be it! If they are truly my friends then they will wait for me. I have many who will and who help me be the best mom I can be. I only surround myself with friends like this. No use wasting time on anything else. As I write this blog I am looking at notes my boys left me. I have them hanging up at work. From my 5-year old, You are very sweet, I love you will all my heart, I hope we will never part!! (ADORABLE). My 11 year old says, I LOVE YOU. Thank you for everything. You are an amazing mom. Just holler when you need a hug (GASP, SOB). My 8 year old writes, You are the grass and I am the tree because I am growing with you always. (PRECIOUS).
My I coworker today asked who my Valentine is and I have to say....its my kids! Another coworker says, what is your hobby? My kids are my hobby. They always will be. The best thing about kids is they grow up and give you grand kids! Which by the way is my next confession. My name is Roxanne and I am a mambaholic!!!! Thanks for getting me through the roughest part of my life.